Updated August 31, 2022 by BetterHelp Editorial Team
Ambition may come and go through different times in someone’s life, whether it be a change in job or a shift in mindset, it is normal to feel less ambition every now and then. However, if your ambition levels are affecting your mood and wellbeing, talking to a therapist may be a great way to understand why you’re feeling less ambitious as well as figure out the best way to improve that ambition to get back on the right track. An online therapist may even be able to help you improve other aspects of your life as well, and result in a long term impact on your overall well-being.
Ambition is defined as the desire and determination to achieve success. The definition of “success” may vary from person to person and culture to culture, but the message remains the same: it’s important to have goals and the determination to complete them.
The truth about ambition
We all sometimes lack ambition. Even the most successful people in the world experience periods of failure and doubt. But they eventually succeed because their ambition reemerges, even in the wake of failure, rejection, and disappointment. Although it can be easy to fall into the trap of defeat when you encounter setbacks, ambition is not about never failing, it’s about getting up when you fall.
Ambition is not an inborn trait. It can be learned and cultivated, the same as any other positive trait. A lack of ambition can certainly be overcome. The possible irony, though, is that overcoming a lack of ambition requires a certain amount of ambition itself. After all, you’re creating a goal with the determination to follow through and achieve that goal. Happily, seeking out ways to improve your ambition is a step in the right direction! However, it takes patience and dedication, and your goals may take three weeks, three months, or even three years, depending on what you’re setting out to try to achieve.
Here are some common questions about this condition:
Is It Normal To Lose Ambition?
Yes, it is normal to experience a loss of ambition, due to a variety of circumstances. Many of us have experienced challenges with motivation since the COVID-19 pandemic hit in 2020. With ongoing uncertainty around the future, many people found it challenging to keep working towards their goals, or experienced burnout due to the many pressures of pandemic life.
Other factors that may contribute to loss of ambition include pursuing something due to external influences instead of intrinsic motivation, underlying fears, and mental health conditions like depression. Believing that you are less ambitious now than you have been previously can feel unsettling. If you are concerned about ongoing lack of ambition or motivation, reach out to a mental health professional who can help you to process what you are experiencing and determine the next steps to take.
Do people lose ambition as they age?
According to an article published in Forbes, it is common to lose ambition with increased age. One study by the Families and Work institute concluded that individuals start losing their ambition to advance in their company around age 35. When we are first becoming established in the workplace, we may seek fulfillment through success at our job or making a certain amount of money. However, as we age, we may shift our focus towards raising a family, or other experiences that provide a sense of meaning and happiness. Or perhaps being ambitious simply looks different in different stages of our life, as our perspectives on success and happiness shift.
27 Ways to help overcome a lack of ambition
If you feel like ‘i’m losing my ambition,’ there are some steps you can take toward improving your ambition, or creating ambition where there previously wasn’t any. These steps may be completed on your own, or under the guidance of your mental health provider.
1. Find a mentor.
Finding someone to look up to whose success closely matches what you hope to achieve can help you find the drive to keep chasing your goals. Maybe it’s someone who works at your company or someone else that you admire.
2. Make your goals visible.
Whether it’s a Pinterest board, index cards, or a whiteboard, create some form of visual representation of your goals so you can see exactly what it is you’re working toward. Having a clear idea of where you are headed can boost motivation.
3. Stay Active.
Staying active improves confidence, mental acuity, and physical health – all things that can help you stay sharp as you work harder toward your goals. Find an activity you really love and stick with it.
4. Give Success a Try.
if you’re feeling short on motivation, try accomplishing some of the steps you need to take to succeed. If you hope to secure a position writing for a major publication, visit your favorite coffee shop and spend the day writing. If you hope to have a family, ask to babysit for a friend.
5. Build Up Support.
If all you see around you are people who are not pursuing their goals, you’re unlikely to pursue your goals either. Try to find friends who are also working toward their goals.
6. Practice An “Abundance Mindset.”
Practice cultivating the mindset of abundance. See a failed relationship as just that: a single failed relationship. See a setback at your work as what it is: one setback. An abundance mindset believes there is always more to be had and always the possibility for improvement.
7. Learn Yourself.
Personality and aptitude tests can offer a lot of insight into yourself – your motivations, your drives, and your pitfalls. Knowing yourself well can help you kickstart the desire to move forward when you’re in the midst of low motivation.
8. 8. Use Envy Well.
Instead of getting stuck in the mire of envy, allow it to fuel you. If you envy your friend’s recent cruise, start saving to go on your own. If you envy your sibling’s ability to purchase their dream home, sit down and determine what you need to get yours.
9. Cultivate Your Talents.
Everyone has something they’re good at. Even if your talents don’t immediately seem impressive (“Who cares if I can juggle?”), there’s likely to be some grain of usefulness or joy in your abilities.
10. Find A Need.
If you’re struggling to find motivation, look outward at how you can improve the lives of the people around you.
11. Make Your Own Meaning.
Before you can truly and effectively chase success, you need to determine what exactly that means to you. Some people measure success by the money they make, while others measure success by the amount of time they’re able to devote to their loved ones or hobbies.
12. Recall Your Triumphs.
Keep your triumphant moments close by for the days you feel you’ve lost all motivation. Recalling your successes can help you leave a funk behind and move forward in working toward your goals.
13. Look Up To Someone.
Unlike a mentor, who is personally involved in your life, find someone whose successes you can admire from a distance. This could be someone who shares a similar background – someone who left poverty behind, for instance-or someone who shares your goals – such as someone who has worked their way to the top of their field in academia. Even a stranger you admire on social media can have a positive influence on you.
14. Leave Negative Self-Talk Behind.
Negative self-talk may seem like merely speaking to yourself realistically, but it serves no function other than tearing yourself down. Instead of using negative speech when speaking to or of yourself, use clear and objective language. For instance, you can change “You’re no good at anything!” to “You struggled at work today, and that’s okay. You’ll try again tomorrow.”
15. Respect The Process.
Success is a process, not a destination. There will always be another obstacle and another hill, so try to enjoy the process as it happens. Many of us get in the mindset of trying to rush and get to a certain point and they miss out on absorbing all of the learning experiences along the way.
16. Create A To-Do List.
Writing down everything you need to accomplish in the next day or the next week can help you free up some much-needed headspace, and can lend a sense of accomplishment to your day each time you get to check off another task.
17. Daydream!
Imagine what your life will finally like once your goals are realized. Although you should not live in fantasy, occasionally indulging in the imagined fruition of all of your hard work can be healthy and motivating. Think of all the possibilities if, say, you had more money, more fulfilling hobbies, or whichever goal you want to pursue.
18. Use Your Passions.
Find things you’re passionate about, and see how they can help you work toward your goals. If you’re passionate about painting, but yearn for a career as a teacher, you can combine the two and work toward an art teaching degree. If you’re passionate about cooking, and hope to work in corporate law, you can use cooking as a means of decompressing and relaxing when your workload has grown too great.
19. Seek Out Motivation
Motivation won’t always come to you – sometimes, you have to chase it. If you don’t feel like getting up in the morning, reward yourself with a trip to your favorite coffee shop. If you don’t want to complete the paper for your class, consider all the stress-free time you’ll have once the paper is finished.
20. Leave Your Comfort Zone.
Comfort zones might feel safe, but they can also stagnate growth. Instead of living in your comfort zone, push yourself to adopt unexplored challenges and try fresh ideas, such as learning a new language. The worst you can do is fail and even that’s okay.
21. Commit To Learning.
Learning is not something you leave behind after your diploma or degree. Every single day, spend some time learning something new and find opportunities to form your own experience with anything you’ve been remotely interested in. Read the paper while eating your breakfast, listen to a podcast on your commute to work, or even just ask a friend or coworker to tell you something new.
22. Just Take One Step.
Put one foot in front of the other in pursuit of your goals. It doesn’t always have to be a giant step, such as moving across the country. It can be merely researching the cost of that move. Remember: planning is part of the work.
23. Believe In Yourself.
You can do hard things! You can change your life. Even when circumstances have given you a rough run, believe you are bigger than your background.
24. Ask For Help.
When it becomes too much – you’re overworked, or the demands on your time are too much to handle – ask for help! Bring in a trusted friend, a family member, or a coworker, and lighten your load. There’s no shame in teamwork.
25. Do Your Research.
Blindly following your dreams can be dangerous. If you move across the country to pursue acting, only to find that you would have to work three jobs (jobs you do not have) to afford a single studio apartment, you’re putting yourself at risk. Instead, identify what steps you need to take to move toward your goals, and take the necessary time to achieve them.
26. Evaluate What Is Important To You.
Sometimes goals shift and needs change. Perhaps your relationship is more important to you than the career you’ve always imagined. Conversely, maybe getting that new job that you’ve dreamed of is more important than the family you wanted. Give yourself the space to change your plans as you go along. Few things kill motivation as effectively as rigidity.
27. Work On Yourself Daily.
You’ll falter. You’ll lose hope. But keep working on yourself! You’re the person who will be with you every step of the way, so make sure you’re cultivating traits and behaviors that you like and can be proud of even at an old age. Watching yourself become the person you’ve always dreamed of is a powerful motivator.
The Origins Of Lacking Ambition – And How To Help
Because the lack of ambition is often a trait borne of childhood modeling, fear of failure, or other complex causes, overcoming a lack of ambition can often require seeking professional help in order to work through other issues, attacking the problem at the root. If your lack of ambition stems from a fear of failure, for instance, a therapist can help you develop tools to leave that fear behind and develop a healthier relationship with yourself in order to more fully and effectively understand the patterns and work that go into success. If your lack of ambition comes from a lack of ambitious modeling, a therapist might be able to orient you toward carving out your own role models. If a lack of ambition has come on the heels of age-related changes, a therapist can help you navigate your next steps – it doesn’t matter if you’re a young adult, of middle age, or a senior citizen, you can make a change.
Therapists can be important tools in self-discovery and self-improvement, as they can help you unravel the roots of problem behaviors, improve problematic thought patterns, and develop strategies to improve your life. Online counseling is becoming one of the most popular ways to work with a therapist. It’s affordable, effective, and you can use it wherever you are and whenever you most need it. BetterHelp is the largest online counseling platform in the world, and can help you get connected to the best therapist to meet your particular needs.**
