By Danilo P. Padua, PhD
My wife and I were excited to attend the Grade 6 graduation ceremonies of our granddaughter, Nazalie Dal B. Padua at the Guiddam Elementary School in Abulug, Cagayan. The tedious travel time of more than 10 hours from La Trinidad to Abulug, by car was just a welcome part of the excitement.
We journeyed a day before the July 11, 2023 commencement exercises. When we reached the place, we were enthusiastically received by our grandchie and our in-laws as if we had not seen each other for years. Fact is, I was also there less than 4 months earlier for a fertilizer derby in the adjacent municipalities of Sta Marcela and Flora in Apayao.
A little health discomfort happened to me even before we reached Laoag city when I started to feel a little chill, developed slight fever, and my eyes became a little painful. I could not hide things to my wife, and to my brother-in-law who did the driving because I started coughing as well. This is not usual for me when I travel anywhere, local or international.
To be honest (but I never shared this to anyone), the possibility of contracting any form of Covid 19 crossed my mind, especially when my situation worsened a bit when we got to the house of my “abalayans”. It brought me fleetingly to a shuddering death of our eldest son in 2021 due to the diseases. I tried to look as normal as possible, so our hosts will not be worried. I think I needed to undergo an acting workshop to be able to succeed about it. My condition was written all over me and it is heard in every corner of our hosts’ house.
After a few minutes of the usual exchange of pleasantries, I excused myself to be able to rest a little bit before dinner time. Of course, I had enough energy to attend my granddaughter’s graduation the following day, even buoyed by the fact they she harvested the most number of medals among the graduates.
The above is not the story that I would like to share but it is a story by a relatively young guest speaker, Dr. Marvelyn Ignacio, an instruction at the Apayao State College. She happens to graduate from the same Guiddam Elementary School, about 19 years earlier.
Here’s a part of her story that started right there in Guiddam, as she related it punctuated from time to time by short pauses to wipe away involuntary spurts of tears that she tried to suppress but couldn’t.
Now, I am the story teller. Even before she entered the elementary grades, she already experienced, together with her family, the economic crunch. Sometimes they could not even eat three square meals a day-the way we understand such term. At times, their breakfast of pandesal would not even appear on the table because the intended pandesal budget was spent instead to buy white spirit drink by her father. Yes, she has a drunkard father who doesn’t care less about his brood, his family.
Because of her father, people in their community have very little respect to the whole family.
Do they have a house? I don’t know if it is called a house but the family were bunched altogether in a shanty-without a door, and even good windows. When it rains outside, there are water falls inside their house making it difficult for everyone to sleep. That is to say, there is very little personal belongings that they possess.
Their father considers their eldest, a son, to be his favourite. But the son met an early death worsening the drunkenness of the father; he will demand money become drunk very often and when he returns to their “house” at that state of stupor, he will terrorize his whole family. During those times, Ms Ignacio’s mother was the one who kept her brood intact, protect them and seek for a temporary shelter in various houses of people who commiserate them. They return only when they learn that the useless, ruthless, and a bum of a father have fallen asleep.
Marvelyn was so affected but did not take it so hard against her father. At a very young age, she resolved that the respect that they lost due to her father’s loose cannon character, should be recovered. She was holding on to the dictum of turning your adversity into an opportunity.
But problem is, they have no resources for the siblings to be able to attend even elementary school. Here, the mother-daughter strong bonding, and consummate relationship was cemented. The mother leads the planting of crops like camote, make the camote cue; the daughter sells the product in school to raise funds for her and siblings’ baon. They did this in the grade schools. While doing this, she was being ridiculed, “bullied” in today’s parlance, telling her for instance that her camcue is very makunat , that’s why they are not buying. Hurting, but perhaps to her young mind, it was just an ingredient for success. In all of this, her home kept a constant stream of encouragement.
During that period, one of her teachers, took her as her ward, providing some financial help, giving sagacious pieces of advice, encouraging her further to strive until she succeeds. Because of such caring attitude of a teacher, she became enamored of becoming a teacher- respected and wise.
In High school, her mom insisted that she brings with her eggplant harvested from her own garden to offer to her teachers, which she dutifully did. Again, her classmates did not look kindly to that. She didn’t care though whether she was so tired even before starting her classes. It helped her greatly in her H.S. journey. The exemplary attitude of her H.S. teachers, especially towards her, reinforced her desire to really pursue a degree in teaching. She realized this on a scholarship at the Cagayan State University, majoring in English.
Her mom was always by her side every step of the way in her scholastic journey, even promising earlier that she will support her studies in college making her cry but happy. For how can she financially support her without work, without source of enough fund?
While she was recounting her story, I thought to myself that it is too long and maybe boring as I saw many of the teachers in attendance were already starting to tell their own stories to their seatmates. But all along, I didn’t realize that some crystals were also rolling down my cheeks as I noticed many in the audience were silently wiping their own cheeks. ( I only recounted here about half of Ms Ignacio’s inspiring narrative).
When she was accepted as a faculty member at ASC, she made sure that they are now living in a more comfortable, real house with secured doors and windows, no more waterfalls inside when it rains. She is returning now the sacrifices done by her mother to her and her siblings. “Its time for her to taste the fruit of her labor, and sacrifices which are at times, at the expense of her safety”, she mused. She brought her mom with her at the graduation ceremonies and very proudly asked her to stand with pride. The mother and daughter were brimming with real, unadulterated joy.
She remembers her father, who died before she graduated the elementary grades, still with thanksgiving and not with derision or much bitterness.
Her vow to earn respect for her family and give a more comfortable life for her mom (and siblings), may have unfortunately prodded her to believe that single-blessedness is a bliss. It’s not yet too late though. **
