By Sparklle Rainne
We all have habits. Habits can refer to virtually any routine, perhaps even unconscious, action that we take regularly. The definition of a habit is “Something that you do often and regularly, sometimes without knowing that you are doing it.” Examples of habits may include drinking a large glass of water first thing in the morning, taking a specific route to your workplace, checking your phone or hitting the snooze button when you wake up, and setting your bag, coat, or shoes in a particular spot when you get home. Our habits can impact how we feel and function throughout the day. For example, if you’re staying up late every night despite having to wake up early for work in the morning, you might experience sleep deprivation. This is why understanding habit change can be so valuable. So, if you’re wondering how to change habits, what can you do?
Why is habit change so challenging?
First, let’s talk about how habits form in the first place and why changing a habit can feel so challenging.
Habit formation theory says that habits develop when we repeat actions over time. Often, habits are accompanied by cues. If you get home and turn on the TV right away, the “cue” would be that you got home. If you’ve been doing this for many years, you have repeated this action based on this cue many times. It makes sense that this habit has become ingrained.
It is possible, with that being said, to change habits. Just as repetition likely caused your current habits to form or become ingrained, repeating new behaviors can help you form new habits or change old ones. Research on neuroplasticity proves that while not always linear, change is most certainly viable.
Alongside repetition, additional tips can help you make the changes you want to make.
Six tips for habit change you may not know
Here are six tips for habit change you may not know about that can help you create new routines over time.
· Tip 1: Use the awareness of your habit(s) to your advantage
You may or may not have heard of the concept of mindfulness. Mindfulness, simply put, is a maintained and purposeful sense of awareness rooted in the current moment.
To change a habit, you have to identify it first. Once you identify the habit you want to change, employ mindfulness by being actively aware of this habit and what may accompany it, such as a specific time that you tend to engage in it. When you notice that you start to engage in the habit or are tempted to, you might say, “Oh! I noticed that I am engaging in this habit again. What can I do instead?”
Some people may even find it helpful to record when they engage in certain habits. They can identify potential patterns, become more aware of them, and better identify how to change them.
· Tip 2: Replace an old habit with something new
You want to consume less caffeine, but you’re drinking three or more cups of coffee per day. When you try to cut coffee out without replacing it, you likely miss it, making it hard to stop. To aid habit change, you may replace your second and third cup of coffee with caffeine-free tea. You get to taste the coffee when you have your first cup, but you’re consuming significantly less caffeine because you replaced your second and third cup of coffee with tea. Alternatively, if the habit is that you turn the TV on as soon as you get home from work, you might replace it with an afternoon walk. Sometimes, you may want to replace a habit entirely, such as in the case of smoking cessation. If that’s true, this tip can still be of aid. For example, many people chew gum in place of cigarettes as part of the smoking cessation process.
· Tip 3: Be specific about the action you want to take
This can go along with replacing an old habit with something new like we talked about above. If you haven’t had success in habit change in the past, it’s possible that getting more specific about the action you want to take can help.
What might this look like? Let’s say that you want to go to bed earlier. You have a habit of staying up late and using your laptop before bed. Instead of just saying, “I want to go to bed earlier,” you may set a specific time — for example, 10 PM. If you’re less specific, there’s more room to say to yourself, “just 15 more minutes,” or otherwise blur the lines when it comes to what going to bed early means, which is why this can be a useful tactic.
If you want to start taking vitamins, engage in skincare more regularly, go outside more often, or something else, identify a specific time where you’ll do those things. This is a great way to improve self-care and practice time management.
· Tip 4: Adjust your environment.
Since, as we talked about when we discussed habit formation, habits are often paired with certain stimuli that initiate them, one tip for habit change that you may not know about is to disrupt your routine or environment. Let’s return to the example of a person who turns their television on as soon as they get home and would like to replace that habit with an afternoon walk.
To adjust the environment in this scenario, the individual could move the remote for the television to another room before they leave for the day. If historically, the remote was readily available and within reach as soon as they walked in the door, this would somewhat disrupt the old routine. To get the remote and turn the television on, they’d have to make an active choice to do so – it’d be more difficult to take this action without being conscious of it.
This can also support the development of new habits. For example, you can put your walking shoes by the door so that it’s easier to get up and go out.
· Tip 5: Use self-compassion
When we want to change something and have trouble doing so, it’s not uncommon to feel shame or judge ourselves. However, this is maladaptive, as shame can make self-regulation more difficult. On the other hand, self-compassion and kindness encourage inner dialogue, which can aid behavior change.
Habit change is a process, and despite popular statements like, “It takes X number of days to change a habit,” the time it takes to establish a new habit varies. So, don’t be discouraged if a new habit doesn’t form right away or if it doesn’t happen the first time you try.
A popular tip for self-compassion and positive self-talk is to talk with yourself the way you’d talk with a friend. So, if you had a friend who is working to change a deeply ingrained but unhelpful habit, you might say to them, “It’s okay; it’s not all or nothing, and there will be a new opportunity to try again tomorrow. All you can give is your best each day, which can look different from day to day.”
· Tip 6: Let a professional help
Therapy can help you make life changes. Not only can it be advantageous to have support from an unbiased, non-judgmental third party, but a therapist can also assist you in finding your way through any sticking points along the way as you work to change a habit. They may be able to give you suggestions or guidance based on your situation, help you move toward positive self-talk to support habit change, identify the root of certain thought patterns and habits you have, and so on. Suppose you want to find a therapist to work with within your area. In that case, you can ask for a referral from a medical professional, check with your insurance company to see what they cover, or conduct a web search for providers near you. You can also consider online therapy as an option.
Online therapy
Online therapy can make getting the help you need easier. It is convenient, but it can make therapy more accessible. Options like BetterHelp allow you to match a professional faster than you may find a therapist to work with within a face-to-face setting. When you sign up for BetterHelp, you’ll take a questionnaire that we’ll use to match you with a therapist. The independent therapists who offer services on the BetterHelp platform have a range of different specialties, allowing you to match with someone who meets your unique needs. You can switch therapists or cancel services at any point in time. Even better, online therapy is backed by research as an effective form of care for various concerns, and it’s regarded as a cost-effective option.**
