By Sophia Angeline G. Delantero
Assignments. Reflection Papers. Exams. Grades.
This is where my world revolves. These are the only things that have worried me for the past 16 years.
I wake up at 12:00 a.m. to scan my notes and prepare to ace whatever quizzes or exams I have to take that day. I ride the jeep wondering if I have enough coins for the fare. I am bothered by the way the rain has soaked my pants and shoes that my mom bought for me. I hate it when my phone is not fully charged when I am supposed to spend the entire day outside.
These, in all honesty, are the things that keep me going. They are the fuel of a child who craves validation through academics. I feel nauseous when I am not worrying about these comets that have occupied my mind. I was led to believe that this is what life is all about, that I am defined by these things.
Shootings in Gaza have been happening for almost two years and eight months now. The Toboso massacre took 19 lives and left families still waiting for justice. The oil price crisis continues to frustrate Filipinos who do nothing but work hard for a living. Underpaid workers struggle to survive on minimum wages, further diminished by taxes whose allocations remain unclear to many.
While I am consumed by thoughts of acing an exam, impressing a high-standard professor with my reflection papers, and achieving the grades I have always aimed for…. the cruel, unfair, and inhumane realities continue to exist beyond the small sphere of my life. There are bigger problems surrounding us.
People suffer because of wars, authority, power, and the desire to control others. My worries seem so small compared to those of people who crawl out from beneath the rubble of their homes, and fighting every day to survive and sustain the little life they have been spared.
Thus, how privileged are we to think that not getting the numbers we have worked so hard for over the past few years is the end of the world?
Assignments. Reflection Papers. Exams. Grades.
The only thing these have in common with the larger complication is their ability to make our minds spiral and convince us that everything is falling apart. But neither is insignificant. Neither is less important.
But sometimes, the grades we cry over are dreams that others would gladly trade their suffering for, and while we spend nights fearing failure, somewhere, someone is simply praying to make it through another day.**
